First thing in the morning was a physical therapy appointment…with a new (at least I didn’t recognize her) technician. Though it was a week and a half since my fingernails had been done, she complimented them, and used feminine forms of address for me. And we had a short discussion about keeping our nails pretty. Nice!
A bit later in the day, it was time to run a few errands, fortunately not in our town. I had to stop at several grocery stores for specials as I passed thru. My wife had provided affinity cards for all the stores, as we do use those to take advantage of specials. At the first grocery store, the thirtysomething female cashier omitted any gender-specific forms of address. No problem with that…
However it was different at the second store, which we had not visited in quite some time….think years, not months. (I didn’t realize that when I went into the store.) But “intuition” guided me straight to the service desk to check the card before doing the shopping. Turns out that was a good thing…
“May I help you, Ma’am?” “Yes, please. Will this card get me these products at the lowest advertised price?” “Let me check.” (Takes card, punches in the numbers…) “No Ma’am. The card is inactive. Let me update it for you. Let’s see….your name is (she recited wife’s first name), right?” “Yes, Ma’am.” “Zip code?” (I provided.) “Phone number?” I provided. “Email address?” I provided my wife’s email address (which includes a feminine word.) “OK, Mrs. Sherman, this card is updated. When you check out, tell the cashier that it was just updated and she can make the machine honor it.”
When I checked out, the card didn’t work (what a surprise) and the cashier had to summon help. In the end, problems were resolved. And when I left with my purchases, the cashier said “Have a nice day, Miss (wife’s first name.)
I’m glad they didn’t ask for ID, or the whole thing would have gotten messy…but it was exciting!
However, that same day…I heard the dreaded “S” word a couple of times elsewhere, so I guess I must cause a bit of confusion…or still have a ways to go on presentation. (But bear in mind that I wasn’t trying to appear female!)
Mandy
Mandy's Miscellany 
I think that instinctively the first thing that people try to assess when they encounter someone is their gender and it certainly seems as if you do present as somewhat of an enigma. Most people do not want to be snide or catty and they do not want to offend. I give them the benefit of the doubt that they are making an effort to get it right.
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